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Burner? I Barely Even Know 'Er!
1st place in Derby #109: School, with 990 votes!
Chemistry
Test tube just blew right up in front of me
Thank God for goggles or I wouldn't see
'Cause I screwed up in
Chemistry
Sodium
Man what was I thinking that was dumb
I could have totally just lost my thumb
Because of all this
Sodium
I
Did
My math wrong
Gone Pete Tong
All over me
I'm
Last
In this class
But it still looked really nea-ea-ea-eat
Chemistry
They'll be pulling shards of glass from me
Maybe I could join the ministry
To save them from my
Chemistry
To save them from my
Chemistry
Wear this shirt: under a protective apron, as it will not keep you safe from hazzardous chemicals. No, that's not a typo, we're talking about Bo and Luke's moonshine. That's powerful stuff.
Don't wear this shirt: unless you promise to punch anyone who says "Wow, like potion class at Hogwarts!" Purchase is consent.
This shirt tells the world: "They called me mad at the Institute! That is to say, the boys did. The girls just never called me."
We call this color: If You're Female And Mad About The Pronouns We Used In "This Shirt tells the world:" And Decide To Complain To Our Boss About Our Blatant Sexism It's Gonna Be Our Asphalt In A Sling
Design Placement: Centered
Design Size:
3X – S: 12" x 10.3"
WXL - K4: 9" x 7.72"
Pantone Color(s): White – 123C – 185C – 2995C – Cool Gray 2C – Black
Please check our sizing chart before you order. The Woot Tee follows a classic closer-fitting style. If you prefer a baggier look, order a larger size. If there is not a larger size, consider starting a belly-hanging-out trend.
A couple weeks ago, Joe Sharkey posted a tale on his blog of a flight attendant requiring passengers to keep their personal belongings out of the seatback pockets. He thought it was an overzealous airline employee. He was wrong.
The original story (that prompted him to do further digging) has strangely disappeared from his BoardingArea blog, but still appears on a (legacy?) blogspot site:
Here's a new one, at least to me. As we taxied before takeoff on a flight tonight from Denver to Tucson, the flight attendant announced that no personal possessions could be placed in the seat-back pocket, because of "FAA regulations."
Nothing, she said. Not a pair of eyeglasses or a newspaper or a paperback book. Only "company-printed materials" were allowed in seat-back pockets, she said, and of course I quote her precisely.
What were these strange new "FAA regulations"? My seat-mate — a hard-core business traveler and until then a stranger to me — and I looked at each other. Surely this could not be a new law. But before takeoff, here the flight attendant comes marching down the narrow aisle on inspection, and right away she spots the books each of us had tucked into the pockets, as we had done thousands of times before.
She was on us like a prison guard. "Gentlemen, I told you, nothing in the pockets," she said. Sheepishly, we put our books in our laps, while the "company-printed materials" (the crappy in-flight magazine, the sales catalog, the barf bag and who knows what else) rode merrily alone in the seat-back pockets.
One does not argue with a flight attendant if one wants to get where one needs to go.
Like Joe, I would have assumed that the flight attendant who was telling passengers that use of the seatback pockets was prohibited was on a power trip. I would have thought the same. Apparently, I would have been wrong, as Joe wrote in yesterday's NYT column.
The Federal Aviation Administration said Monday that airlines whose flight attendants had been telling passengers that no personal items of any kind could be placed in seatback pockets were "following our guidance, if they are enforcing this with travelers."
The agency's response came after numerous inquiries following a flight I made from Denver to Tucson operated by SkyWest Airlines, on which the flight attendant announced before takeoff that, as a safety measure, nothing could be placed in seatback storage pockets — no eyeglasses, no ticket stubs, no iPods or bottles of water or magazines.
What. The. Hell.
I understand the ban on sticking your laptop computer into the seatback pocket. That's a big item that peeks out of the pocket and can hurt someone if it flies out.
But a book? A sheet of paper? A ticket stub? Have we lost all sense of logic?
If the contents of the pocket are truly dangerous then ban everything. Ban SkyMall catalogs. Ban the safety cards. Ban barf bags (with ads, or with art, or anything on them.) Ban "American Way," "Hemispheres," and the (oh-so-creatively titled) "US Airways Magazine." They're a threat to your safety! Hide the kids!
For the time being, it doesn't appear that airlines are actively enforcing this. Most appeared to be unaware of the rule — which originated in a 2007 cabin safety directive put out by the FAA — so for now, it's still going to be the exception, not the rule, to hear this rule announced. But once is too much. This is just plain stupid.
I'm reminded of Ryanair. The much-maligned Euro-WalMart of the skies, has never had seatback pockets, as a way to save money on cleaning expenses (and restocking those magazines).
Apparently, we are all Ryanair passengers now.
(Thanks to reader Nicole Rowan for drawing the column to my attention!)
Ever notice how rechargeable batteries seem weak and barely hold a charge? Mike Adams, a blogger for Natural News made an interesting discovery about his Energizer Rechargeable "D" batteries. The "stated capacity of the battery is just 2500 mAh - the same capacity as typical AA batteries." So if they seem weak, it's because they are weak.
But let's give Energizer the benefit of the doubt: perhaps there are technical reasons that reasons that rechargeables are weaker. In fact, at 1800 mAh, Rayovac D batteries are even weaker than Energizers.
But that can't be it. A number of rechargeable D batteries are available online at comparable costs with up to 10,000 mAh.
Adams discovered that if you take the Energizer "D" battery apart, you'll find a surprise:
The Energizer "D" battery is actually just a cheap plastic shell surrounding a much smaller, low-capacity battery similar in size and capacity to an "AA" battery.
Batteries with the higher capacity are, unsurprisingly, significantly heavier than the Energizers.
So there you go. Adams sees this ploy as a concerted effort by battery manufacturers to dampen consumer interest in the rechargeable market, thus maintaining profits from a lucrative throwaway product. But whether you buy into the planned obsolescence theory or not, it's probably a good idea to shop around for your rechargeables, and to compare stated capacities.
Energizer "D" Battery Exposed [Natural News] (Thanks to Jamie Hodges!)
If It Only Had a Heart
See the Astonishing Machine-Man! Mechanized Golem of the Industrial Age!
A robot's arms are powerful, a robot's legs are strong
A robot's eyes can see in infra-red
A robot can rip cars in two, or blithely stroll along
Across the sea floor, where, if you strolled, you be dead
A robot is an awesome thing, all circuitry and steel
And vacuum tubes and pipes and valves and gaskets
But is it lonesome deep inside? How's a robot feel?
Nobody knows, 'cause no one thinks to ask it
No one hugs the robot, 'cause he's greasy and he's cold
And no one gives him food—he doesn't eat
And when a robot's belts wear out, or when he gets too old
He's scrapped for parts, or chucked out on the street
A robot's brain has processors and chips and stuff inside
A robot's memory has not failed yet!
We humans heal from pain; our heartbreaks finally subside
But robots—those poor robots—can't forget
Wear this shirt: to support 826michigan,, the Great Lakes State chapter of 826 National. This non-profit project offers free workshops, tutoring, writing rooms, and other resources to students aged 6 to 18 who want to develop their creative and expository writing skills. The artist's proceeds from this shirt will go to the Michigan chapter, housed in the world-renowned Liberty Street Robot Supply & Repair facility.
Don't wear this shirt: if you hate literature, or children, or learning, or the idea of a better future.
This shirt tells the world: "I call it my 'Chris-wear.'"
We call this color: Asphaltomaton.
Design Placement: Centered
Design Size:
3X – S: 11" x 13.08"
WXL - K4: 8.25" x 9.81"
Pantone Color(s): Cool Gray 3C – Cool Gray 7C – Black
Please check our sizing chart before you order. The Woot Tee follows a classic closer-fitting style. If you prefer a baggier look, order a larger size. If there is not a larger size, consider starting a belly-hanging-out trend.
Picasa Web Albums—the internet-facing component of the popular desktop photo management application—has added a new feature that lets you collaborate on albums with your friends.
Collaborating on an album is easy:
To make an album collaborative, sign in to Picasa Web Albums and add contributors. Just click the 'Share' button, add contributors, and leave the 'Let people I share with contribute photos' checkbox selected
You can also manage access for contributors you've added to the 'Shared with' list by toggling the 'plus' icon next to their name — when the plus icon is green they can add photos.
To contribute once you've been invited to collaborate on an album, just log into Picasa Web Albums with your Google account and visit the album you've been invited to join. You'll see an Add photos button you can hit to upload your own pics to the album.
It seems like a nice little feature, and definitely something we'd like to see from more photo sharing apps (we're looking at you, Flickr).
The tricky containers that hold shampoo, lotion, and condiments come in leave a lot to be desired when it comes to getting every last bit of the product out. Use these tricks from Consumer Reports to get your money's worth.
Consumer Reports tested a variety of containers used for products around the home and found that there was a large disparity between promised amounts and how easily you could get all the product you paid for out of the container.
The worst offenders were lotion bottles. Almost a quarter of the product was left behind when the container appeared to be "empty", thanks to the thicker consistency of the lotion. Toothpaste, despite being frustrating when you're down to the last squeeze, is actually packaged rather efficiently and generally only a small amount is left behind. Watch the video below for some tips on getting full use out of the products you purchase:
Check out the full article for more tips and a breakdown of container types and which ones require the most wrangling to give up their cargo.
Here are six wonderful photos readers added to The Consumerist Flickr Pool this week, one incredibly creepy one (I apologize in advance to any coulrophobics, especially if you're also a chronomentrophobic), and one that has no asthetic value but you just have to see. Check 'em out!
by pstardesign
by MGChan
by mirnanda
by kodiax2
by jking89
by frankieleon
by campero
by 20 buckz
Our Flickr Pool is the place where Consumerist readers go and upload photos for possible use in future Consumerist posts. Just be a registered Flickr user, go here, and click "Join Group?" up on the top right, and start hitting "send to group" on your individual photos you want to add to the pool.
Add your shots to The Consumerist Flickr Pool, and perhaps they'll get featured in a future story, or even highlighted in a Friday Consumerist Flickr Pool Finds post. See previous winners of the Friday Consumerist Flickr Pool finds here.
I never seem to live anywhere a cart is usable, and I hate wheelbarrows. Working in my garden, I've hauled everything from straw bales to gravel with the help of Burden Cloths. I've been using them for about 20 years, and have the patio (3x3') and farm (5x5') sizes right now.
As opposed to a tarp or burlap, the Burden Cloth has one-inch-wide stout cotton webbing double-sewn around the entire edge of the cloth, adding strength and durability. Burlap just isn't as sturdy as the material used in Burden Cloth. At the corners, the webbing comes out and forms a loop before continuing onto the next side. The loops are probably 6 to 8 inches in radius; you can custom order them larger. I get the recycled cloth option (canvas is available for a little more), and they always come in interesting colors or patterns.
You could certainly make your own: get sturdy cloth, stout webbing, and sew away. You probably wouldn't have to have a commercial sewing machine to do it, but I'm not sure. I could knit socks too, but I don't do that either.
-- Gani RuthellenBurden Cloth
$35 (4x4', recycled)
Manufactured by and available from Timeless and Daughters
Related Entries:It's bad enough when robots call you ad nauseum to pitch you their products and political causes and track down unpaid bills, but it's even worse when the uncouth androids mistake you for another person.
Such is the plight of David, who is being hassled by cyborg creditors of his phone number's previous owner. He writes:
For the past couple of years we have been receiving calls from a half dozen assorted credit collection (or similar) agencies asking to speak to Mr. Donald (redacted). Generally we ignore the calls b/c if we don't know the caller Id we don't pick up, and they just leave a message. Occasionally I'll recognize one of the #'s, b/c they call so much, so I'll answer and tell them that Donald Orlando doesn't live here, never has lived here (at least in the 6 years I've lived here), and to please remove us from any and all lists.
But I'm guessing that his collection then gets sold to someone else who starts calling over and over, etc... Is there any way to permanently make these calls stop? Is there some way to convince 'someone' that they have the wrong phone # for this person? So that even if the collection gets sold, or someone new takes up the case, that they'll know they have a bad phone #?
The you can opt out of the calls, although that's only if the caller is playing by the rules and you manage to suffer through the entire message in order to hear the proper escape instructions. Otherwise I'd say a steady diet of call screening and possibly changing your number may be in order. If all else fails, you can always jack into the Matrix, learn kung fu, enlist the help of blade runners and bring the fight to Skynet.
Have any of you been in David's situation and managed to find your way out?
(Photo: bjornmeansbar)